The middle of things

For some reason, everyone around me seems to be in the middle of things. A friend reached out about being in the middle of a job that’s irritating her. Another friend who’s running an agency is in the middle of a run of good but gruelling work. I’m there too, 2 years into being a founding member of a startup that is also at a weirdly similar phase. 

Also, it’s the middle of the year and it’s getting cold in Bangalore.

What does the middle mean? Something that’s definitely a good few miles from the start but also a significant distance from the end. And to be clear, the situations I'm talking about are not all the same: jobs, relationships, careers, projects. It’s just that they all seem to be in a weird, weary time.

Now, all this could just be the musings of a random middle aged brain. Which of course they are. But there is some truth in here as well: The middle is the toughest phase of everything.

This is when the novelty has worn off, and what felt natural and easy begins to feel like work, and there seem to be demands from every direction that seem to overwhelm you. Getting through this will not be easy, but it will be rewarding. But that’s not my point. My point is that the middle of things, where everything seems blah, and you just seem to be doing the same thing over and over, and there’s no excitement and gratification, is life.

In the last few years, I've noticed that an idea that everyone seems to have started to believe is that everything has to be exciting all the time. And since I’ve already established that I’m slightly older, I have no problem blaming it on social media. New jobs, new trips, engagements, a never ending wedding, new songs, there always seems to be a lot going on in the world but not with you. Except that everyone seems to have forgotten that for the most part, life is boring and mundane. School was a lot of fun, but for a majority of it, you are studying. University was fun, but for most of it, you were wondering how to get your attendance straight. Once you get to work and family life, it’s more boring than usual, I’ll grant you that. But what’s also true is that taxes, Excel sheets, and wondering if you should quit whatever project you are right in the middle of is exactly what life is.

In cricket, the middle of ODI innings and phases in test matches, are where everything seems to slow down. The going gets tough. This is the plodding, get-your-singles part of the game that everyone always likes to switch channels on. But this is exactly when big innings are constructed. A good looking 30 means nothing, a carefully constructed 150 is the match. One good spell is nothing. Working a good batsman out over 2 hours is the match. And if you are not watching this, you are missing the heart of the game itself.

And that is what I want to say, I guess. This middle part is tough for me too, and I’ve been struggling. But if I’ve learnt anything in these years of life and work, it’s that the middle overs are the days of our lives. We have to find ways to enjoy them, whether that’s a cold beer after a long day or a great movie on the weekend is up to you. Just don’t quit whatever you are working on, or that friendship that's taking work, or whatever it is that you are in the middle of. The reward will come, and getting through the middle is also reward in itself.